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The Tea Party DC Guide 24, August 2010

Posted by thegulfblog.com in American ME Relations.
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Blue: You can travel safely in this area without encountering immigrants, Africans, homosexuals, automatic weapons, or homosexuals with automatic weapons. If you avoid the Green and Yellow Metro lines. And buses. And coffee shops. And restaurants. And taxis

Red: You will encounter people in these areas who have never been to an Applebee’s in their lives. USE CAUTION. Especially if they try to talk Mexican at you.

This map is to help those patriotic hicks people off to see Sarah ‘just a Hockey Mom’ Palin and Glenn ‘I just love my country so damn much’ Beck in Washington D.C.

Before you think that this map is just some mean, snide, liberal attempt at mockery, this map is actually based on information given by a Tea Party supporter offering advice to those arriving in the Capital.

Here’s my favorite excerpt:

Safety and Mores

DC’s population includes refugees from every country, as the families of embassy staffs of third world countries tend to stay in DC whenever a revolution in their homeland means that anyone in their family would be in danger if they went back. Most taxi drivers and many waiters/waitresses (especially in local coffee shops like the Bread and Chocolate chain) are immigrants, frequently from east Africa or Arab countries. As a rule, African immigrants do not like for you to assume they are African Americans and especially do not like for you to guess they are from a neighboring country (e.g. Eritrea, Ethiopia, Somalia) with whom they may have political or military tensions. It’s rare to meet anyone who gets really offended, but you can still be aware of the issue.

Many parts of DC are safe beyond the areas I will list here, but why chance it if you don’t know where you are?

If you are on the subway stay on the Red line between Union Station and Shady Grove, Maryland. If you are on the Blue or Orange line do not go past Eastern Market (Capitol Hill) toward the Potomac Avenue stop and beyond; stay in NW DC and points in Virginia. Do not use the Green line or the Yellow line. These rules are even more important at night. There is of course nothing wrong with many other areas; but you don’t know where you are, so you should not explore them.

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Comments»

1. Abu Arqala - 24, August 2010

If you think that’s scary, then listen to the brother of the Republican candidate for US President, drop a bombshell about Northern Virginia.


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